Setting Fire to the Mountain: Hekate Dreams

Last night I dreamed of Hekate and She said, “Do it. Set fire to it all.” I’ll be teaching at Tejas camp in October. Hekate is the goddess of the camp, so – our team discussions, and my own work, are opening to Her more and more. I always have a sense of Her physically when I work with Her, but She hasn’t had anything to say to me for a long time. Generally, She just stands still and silent at the crossroads, giving me choices, waiting and watching.

I’d been listening to the song “I See Fire” last night. The song has a different effect on me – it sounds like the beauty of fire, to me. A whole mountain on fire, from the inside – that is something that would be worth seeing, I always think when I hear the song. And then I have my usual doubts that come up with fire – yes, but it’s destructive, yes,  but it gets out of control, it kills, it burns. It burns. If you love fire, as I do, you understand the concept of a two-edged sword.

The other elements get out of control and kill, too. But it’s fire most people seem to think of when they think of “danger” and “element”. But a witch, now – for a witch (for this witch, anyway), that’s just what it is to have power. We have power, we’re dangerous, we could use it badly. And – when power is needed, well, we can use it then, too. The same risks I’m willing to take with fire, I’m willing to take to use power. I do try to use both well.

The mythic feel of the dream is lingering, and I’m wondering what Hekate was telling me. As always, when She speaks to me, it’s brief, to the point. I don’t know what She was telling me, specifically. But I saw the mountain in my dream, when She said “Set fire to it all.” I think She is saying that something big needs to be transformed, and it will be such a change that I might hesitate. And She’s saying: “Don’t hesitate.” A dangerous guideline when you’re messing with fire in a big way. But if the Goddess is going to talk to me, in my experience, it isn’t usually about small things.

So I am on the lookout for what I should set fire to. Reminding myself of the way fire sustains – sustaining us with warmth when we need warmth, sustaining my spirit when my spirit needs warming, or ecstasy. Sustaining my community when transformation is called for. Sustaining sometimes by destruction that leaves room for something new to grow.

And mostly, I’m remembering how clear Her voice was in my dream. How in the dream, I loved that She was there with me. Her time is different – I may find out what she meant soon, or later, or in the next lifetime. But I feel blessed that She’s talking. I want to carry Her spirit into camp with me in October, and Her presence in my dreams tells me She’s good with that.

Blessings of fire to us all, at this, the time of the solstice.

Sacred body – because, face it, you have one

A good friend of mine believes many healers, shamans, witches, were something other than human in most of their other lifetimes. She believes we chose to be in a human body, on this earth, now, because the earth so badly needs us. I was skeptical at first – but that concept would explain so much about why being in a body is sometimes a challenge for me.

I’m an Enneagram 7 – I flee from pain, and part of what I’m fleeing from is physical pain I experienced when I was very young. In my early years in earth-based religion, my joy was to sink into trance and leave my body behind. I thought of my body – my humanness – as something that got in the way of my connection to the sacred. I sought to transcend being human, being of matter.

Then, some years ago, Mooncrone, a sister in one of my spiritual groups, offered a Hecate retreat on the sacredness of being human. When she told me the theme of the retreat – that it’s sacred to be human – I didn’t really understand what she meant. But over the retreat, Hecate gently led me to the understanding that being human wasn’t something to transcend, as I’d been trying to do. It was key – part and parcel – of being effective as a spiritual being and a spiritual leader. Sustainable body – the willingness to accept my body, in every way. Sustainable spirit – the uses and joys of my body as a pathway to ecstasy and connection, with the sacred and with other sacred human beings.

I worked with Andrea Barrett on my MFA thesis, and one thing she told me over and over was “Learn your own individual process, and learn to love your process, because you’re stuck with it. It’s all you’ve got. Learn to make the most of it.” As a daughter of the Goddess and a priestess, I am human. That’s my process. I have worked to do more than learn to live with that process – I am beginning to fully understand that, far from being something that stands in my way, my humanness and my body are the essence of sacred. Pretty basic for a pagan girl, I know – another basic insight that I somehow missed along the way, and am so grateful to be exploring now.

The blessings of Hecate on us all, spiritual beings having an earthly experience.